Sunday, February 28, 2010
Conflict of Mind ..
you know what.. i am crazy.. i love you.. but i don't think i am the right girl for you..
i don't think i can always be there to support you.. even though i promise to be, may be the circumstances will not let "me" be "me"..
and that is the reason i want to break up with you..
i just want to throw this thought out of my mind but i can't.
i know it will hurt you and it will hurt me much much more.
i never thought you to be mine.. as i never saw my prince charming in you.. but still there is a strange feeling for you.. a special one ! the way you care for me and understand me. noone does ! most,..the way you love me.. made me love you ! and after that no image mattered ..
but the reason is that i don't think i fit in the frame of your miss right.. being like the girl u wanted..is not in my hand. being like your that classmate.. sorry i can't.. i know you never asked me to be like her.. but still once you told me she is like the ideal girl for you and i don't think i can be "her" because i am "me"..
and the most important reason is that i won't be able to be with you forever.. nor you will be able to, and even you know this thing very well..
and what i wrote above "that is the reason i want to break up with you.." is just written and said.. i don't want to do this.. but i don't know what forces me to think so ..what says i must do so.. i just don't know..! a lot of questions are in my mind and there is noone to answer and stop my conflict of mind..
and she stopped writing, tears rolled down her cheeks ..and she rubbed her hand on her eyes..and closed her diary after mentioning her signature.
p.s just tried to remind old thoughts.. again an old post :)